What Does ‘Drop the Rock’ Mean – and How Can it Help With Recovery?

Addiction recovery is all about letting go of burdens that hold us back. “Drop the rock” refers to identifying and releasing character defects that sabotage sobriety and personal growth. This powerful concept, borrowed from Alcoholics Anonymous traditions, teaches people in recovery how to identify harmful patterns, accept responsibility for change, and practice ongoing surrender.

What is ‘Dropping the Rock?’

“Dropping the Rock” comes from a parable often shared in recovery circles about swimmers crossing a lake while carrying heavy stones.[1] The rocks represent character defects, resentments, and destructive patterns that weigh down recovery efforts. When swimmers finally drop these rocks, they can move forward freely toward healing. The phrase has become synonymous with the work done in Steps Six and Seven of the Twelve-Step programs, where people become willing to have their shortcomings removed.

This concept encourages those in recovery to identify specific character traits and behaviors that block their progress. These include perfectionism, people-pleasing, controlling tendencies, dishonesty, or holding grudges. Recognizing these patterns and actively working to release them – through prayer, meditation, support groups, and conscious daily choices – helps people find freedom from the burdens that once fueled their addictive behaviors. Dropping the rock isn’t a one-time event – it’s a continuous practice of self-awareness and surrender throughout the recovery journey.

How Does it Relate to Alcoholics Anonymous (AA)?

Dropping the rock is deeply embedded in Alcoholics Anonymous culture and practices. The concept directly connects to Steps Six and Seven of AA’s Twelve Steps, which focus on becoming ready to have character defects removed and humbly asking for help in this process.[2] Many sponsors use this metaphor when guiding newcomers through these critical middle steps of the program.

The phrase gained widespread popularity through AA addiction literature, particularly the unofficial companion text titled Drop the Rock: Removing Character Defects.[3] This book has become essential reading for many AA members working to deepen their recovery beyond initial sobriety. The metaphor perfectly aligns with AA’s emphasis on spiritual growth, personal responsibility, and the need to address underlying issues beyond just stopping drinking. Regular AA meetings often include discussions where members share their experiences identifying and releasing their “rocks,” reinforcing this fundamental recovery principle within the fellowship.

About AA Programs

Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) has become the foundation for many recovery journeys since its founding in 1935.[4] The program centers around Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions that guide members toward sobriety and spiritual growth. 

The Big Book (officially titled Alcoholics Anonymous), first published in 1939, outlines the core principles and methods of the program. This text combines personal stories with practical instructions for working through the steps. AA meetings happen globally in various formats, from speaker meetings to step studies, creating spaces where people can share experiences without judgment. 

The program emphasizes that recovery happens through connection with others, spiritual awakening, and helping fellow alcoholics. While rooted in spiritual principles, AA welcomes people of all beliefs and backgrounds, focusing on practical solutions rather than dogma. The enduring success of AA has inspired numerous other recovery programs that adapt its principles for different addictions and challenges.

What Are Defects of Character? 

Character defects represent persistent patterns of thinking and behaving that harm ourselves and others. In recovery settings, these traits often develop as survival mechanisms but ultimately become barriers to healing and connection. Recognizing these patterns is the first step toward releasing their power over our lives.[5]

• Fear that paralyzes decision-making and prevents vulnerability
• Dishonesty with oneself and others about feelings, needs, and actions
• Resentment toward people, institutions, or circumstances perceived as harmful
• Self-centeredness that prevents empathy and connection with others
• Perfectionism creates impossible standards that lead to disappointment
• Control trying to manage outcomes, people, and situations beyond our power
• Pride that prevents asking for help or admitting mistakes
• Impatience with the natural pace of healing and growth
• Intolerance of differences in others or alternative perspectives
• Jealousy focusing on what others have rather than personal gratitude
• Procrastination is voiding necessary actions through delay tactics
• Catastrophizing, assuming the worst possible outcomes in any situation
• Guilt carrying excessive responsibility for past actions despite amends
• Denial refusing to acknowledge problems or their impact

How Dropping the Rock Can Help With Recovery

Working on your character defects can transform your recovery. When people in recovery actively practice dropping their rocks, they create space for positive change and deeper connection.

• Reduced emotional triggers that might lead to relapse
• Improved relationships with family, friends, and community
• Greater self-awareness that helps identify unhealthy patterns before they cause harm
• Increased serenity from letting go of control and perfectionism
• Better stress management through healthier coping mechanisms
• Spiritual growth that provides meaning and purpose beyond substance use
• Enhanced communication skills that prevent isolation and secrecy
• Stronger boundaries with oneself and others
• Freedom from shame, which often fuels addictive cycles
• More authentic living aligned with personal values and goals

Do I Need to Participate in a 12-Step Program?

While Twelve Step programs like Alcoholics Anonymous have helped many people recover from substance use disorders, they aren’t the only path to recovery. Many individuals find healing through alternative approaches that better match their preferences and needs.

Recovery is highly personal, and what works effectively varies from person to person. Some find success through evidence-based therapies like Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Motivational Interviewing, or SMART Recovery, which offers a science-based alternative to 12-Step programs. Others benefit from medication-assisted treatment, particularly for opioid or alcohol use disorders, where medications help manage cravings and withdrawal symptoms.

Many recover through professional treatment, community support, spiritual practices, holistic approaches, and lifestyle changes. The most important factor is finding an appropriate approach for you and addressing your challenges. If you’re uncertain about which direction to take, speaking with addiction medicine specialists or therapists can help clarify your options and create a personalized recovery plan.

About Substance Use Disorders

Substance use disorders occur when repeated use of alcohol, drugs, or other substances causes significant health problems and interferes with daily responsibilities.[6] These complex conditions affect brain function and behavior, creating powerful urges to continue substance use despite harmful consequences. Addiction can often begin as casual use, but can also quickly transform into compulsive behavior as substances change brain chemistry related to reward, stress, and self-control.

These disorders exist on a spectrum from mild to severe and can involve various substances including alcohol, prescription medications, and illegal drugs.[7] People with substance use disorders typically experience tolerance (needing more to achieve the same effect), withdrawal symptoms when stopping use, unsuccessful attempts to quit, continued use despite problems, and significant time spent obtaining, using, or recovering from substances. Treatment approaches vary widely based on individual needs, substance involved, and severity of the disorder, but often include a combination of therapy, support groups, medication, and lifestyle changes.